Wednesday, December 31, 2014

2014 Recap

Despite the hectic schedule of mine, I still wanted to write in my inside story on this very last day of 2014. A quick recap I guess - of what has been happening in my 2014 book. :)

Where to start? Well, let's start with me then.

Self - Well, my 2014 resolutions was to be a better person than I have been before. One thing that I notice in me, is I've tried practicing and applying the think-before-you-talk act and less judgmental towards others. Good, right? Aside from that, I tried to help others as much as I can. The bad side of me is, at times I tend to exaggerate stories so that others would interested to listen to me.  Phew.

Family - New addition to the family members. Say hello to my future sister in law, Marrion. Hehe. It's the year of family gathering I guess. One of my unexpected achievements is to be able to gather and organize  Ekon's Family gathering. Thank God. Everyone was very supportive.

Geng Sumandak - 2 Sumandaks changed their status this year. Hehe! Congratulations Rai, the newly married couples and Lie, just engaged. (When will be my turn ar? Haha!)  For the first time after 8 years, all of us, 10 to be exact were able to gather again for Rai's wedding. Great, isn't it?

Lovelife - My Incikk Dearr. As for this year, we are celebrating our 1st year anniversary being in a relationship. We've been through the ups and downs together and hopefully our love gets stronger with each coming year. Aiseeeeh! Hehe.

OT - I resigned from my first job and now I'm an OT in a hospital setting. Thank God. I do missed being the school OT but I believe it's for the best. Quite a good year for  me I guess in OT career. I've been to few job interviews in which I failed in most of it. I only succeed in the job that I'm in now. Haha. And another interview coming actually, next week! You're the best Lord. Amen.

Social life - Being 25, I'm more open to social event invitations. Haha! If previously, I'm not that eager or interested to go and attend wedding celebrations but this year, I've fulfill most of it. I mean I went to 1/3 of the wedding invitations. I'm beginning to enjoy attending social events and at the same time exposing self beauty to others. Hahahahaha! *screw that*

I met and get to know many new friends aka new colleague. Pertambahan dalam bilangan kenalan . Hehe.

Faith A challenged faith. Total temptations and very difficult to resist. Phew. I deliver everything into your hands God, I'm just your weak servant. May I be strengthen in faith by this coming year. Amen.

Country issues - MH370 ; MH 17; QZ8501 ; Floods in East Coast Malaysia
Dear Lord, I humbly pray and seek for your mercy that bless this people involved in this situation. Everyone of them. Give them strength, faith and courage  Amen.

Farewell 2014, for you have given me wonderful memories. Thank you. May next year, 2015 would be a fruitful year for everyone of us. Amen,


Sunday, December 14, 2014

Back to December

Gosh! Final month of the year 2014. Hectic schedule these days made me rarely  share my inside story.  :(

I have a lot to spill out actually. As weird yet funny as it can be,  inspirations to write came in the moments of my hectic-so-called-schedule.

I wanted to share about my experience during  maid of honor's dress fitting; life as a new setting OT, life lessons, stuffed emotions and so much more.

We've entered the third week of Advent. Christmas is so around the corner. How's your preparation?

Me? Well, physically, emotionally and above all religiously - I'm not prepared yet. Phew. It's just that, I'm feeling calmer, blessed more than ever after going for a confession. Thank God.

New Year is a few weeks away and honestly speaking, I'm not quite sure what I really want  in life. I'm 25 and I should be well aware of all that by now but I'm not. Should that be something that I need to worry about? Or let it be. ?

Anyway, I'm thankful and blessed Lord. You know what's best for me. Amen.


Sunday, November 9, 2014

A Challenged Faith

Faith . Faith alone can change on how we perceive our world today.

Back in the past, I've always thought that I would be able to overcome this temptations. A specific kind. But, honestly, now, I can't. It has been very difficult for me to really fight them.

When I come to think of it, it's actually a signal telling me that I need to strengthen and keep my faith to God at all times. I am indeed weak.

I have been challenged. My faith has been challenged. I realized that and I need God more than ever.

Dear Lord, I asked for your endless guidance and blessings  that I may be faithful to you at all times. I may fail to resist temptations but  I believe in Your mercy and love - that You will always welcome me in Your home. Amen.

Missed October. :(

I missed my October post. Fuhh. :( . No matter how busy I am, I always make sure that I updated my inside story at least once a month but I guess, schedule was a bit hectic last month. :( again.

Well, actually- I'm not that busy. I'm tired. Super tired. Getting up early in the morning, driving all the way from home to work, reached home at dark. So, basically that's how my routine for now. But still, thank you Lord. I'm alive, I can drive, I have a job. Thank you Lord.

Hello everyone! I'm the new OT in Metro Town. Hehe
I just got my name tag. Wow, I can feel the butterflies now. This is another new challenge in life as an OT. I guess, I need to restudy and refresh again. 

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

25 today!

Turning 25 today. Yippee! Hooray!! I'm officially 25 years old today.

Thank you Lord. Thank you for everything. I am more than blessed. Amen.

I found this article a few months ago and decided to bookmark it. For today's  inside story : 25 Things You Should Know About Turning 25

Feel free to read them . :)

Feeling a little bit different being officially 25 today. Previous birthdays, I've always looking forward how today may look like. But, not this year birthday, I guess. Today was just a typical day for me. Still, I am thankful to You, Lord.

I purposely didn't share my birth date on Facebook this year but still there were friends who posted birthday wishes on my wall. Thank you guys. I really appreciate it. May the good Lord bless you too.! 

I am indeed truly, more than blessed with what I have now.  Birthday wishes for this year? Well, I just wish that I would have a stronger faith as a Christian, be courageous and always try to improve myself to be a better me. Amen.

Happy Birthday dear self! :)

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Personality Test

 Is this the real me ? hmm.

This was one of the talk last Friday, and I enjoyed it. I may have been to this kind of talk previously but let's just say that this latest one, an opportunity to really getting to know the real me. :)

Well, just to summarize about the personality talk - according to Hippocrates philosophy (if I'm not mistaken) there are four types of personality among human. These are Sanguine, Choleric, Melancholic and Phlegmatic. All of us is actually a mixture / a blend of this 4 characters.

So, for me, I'm a mixture of Sanguine and Phlegmatic. Popular Sanguine and Peaceful Phlegmatic.

Understanding yourself  helps you to understand others better. Indeed. Although for now I may be able to understand and get to know myself well, still at some point, it's a bit difficult to understand others.

I pray to you Lord, may I'd be given the patience and wisdom to understand others more, just like I know myself well. Amen.

Friday, September 19, 2014

New job

Hi Ho! How have you been? Hopefully, this early September has been good to you .

Well, for me - this is a second week of a new job. Frankly speaking, the first week wasn't that good. I was feeling down, blur and yeah, was thinking of quitting (same old feeling when I first enter uni). But, I repeatedly try hard enough to tell myself that I'm in a process of adjusting and adapting - and that soon, I'll be just fine.

Oops. I haven't told you about my new job right? I'm still an OT - OT in a hospital setting. Totally a new area to be explored and of course new surroundings as well.

Thank God! Almost come to the end of second week today and I'm feeling much better . Thank you Lord. Amen.

As usual, people around keep asking me how is the new job. Well, couldn't say much as the real job hasn't even started yet. I still considered now as an orientation week. This is because the building hasn't fully completed yet - and thus our current task now is to do task presentations; which is actually super good as this is to refresh our long long time no see buried knowledge and skills. Hehe.

Okay, sleep time! Hehe. Till then, take care. :)

 Direct my steps O Lord, for You know what's best for me. Amen

Monday, September 1, 2014

1 year and more than a half. :)

I was going to blog last night before August ends but my sleepy level was higher than my blogging mood.

Anyway, Hello September! Favourite month of the year! Hehe

Well, September will be my new beginning of a new job. Thanks God for that. I should be starting my very first day tomorrow but there are still  a lot of unfinished business aka buzy-ness in Seri Mengasih, I need another week extra.

1 year and 8 months - here in Seri Mengasih Centre. Some might say, it was long enough but some might say, " Ah. Sekejap saja pun." Say it long enough nor sekejap saja pun, but I gained a lot. New friends, life lessons, getting to know the children and of course OT experience.

I remember, the moment when I was still a volunteer ( that was in 2012), I said to myself that I need to get this job. In short, I need to be part of Seri Mengasih. And yes, I did! on 2013, I nailed it. I'm in! 

First few months I was here, all I could think of was - this is only temporary, I'll get a better job later. But, as time passes by, I no longer think of the temporary ideas. I was like, "Yeah, this is it. I love it here. I love being with the kids and etc." So, that was actually motivates me and act as an catalyst to love my job even more.  ( So in love being an OT on that time. Hehe - I still do for now. Haha)

Actually, when I come to think of it again, it was quite a short stay, right? Haha. Because I was planning on being here for 2 years, but instead, only 1 year and 8 months. Never mind.

Being here for only 1 year and plus, I've experienced so many wonderful moments; with the kids, with my colleagues. And yes, knowing someone whom I'd never thought would be in my VIP list.

I laughed, I get scolded, I get angry, I cried - but all in all, Seri Mengasih had given me memories to treasure for a life time.

Thank you. Thanks a lot to everyone here in Seri Mengasih. Forgive me if my words, actions may have hurt you in ways that I may notice it or not. Till we meet again.

Closing event @ finale as an OT here in Seri Mengasih - Giant Sand Play . :)

Monday, August 11, 2014


I seriously over think everything, which makes me stress myself out and create problems that weren't even there in the first place.

Sounds familiar, right?

I bet you've been there before - and I'm in it, now. Phew.

As for now, actually it has been going on for some time already - I over think a lot. Stressing a lot. Worrying a lot. Of things that actually weren't even there or the uncertain or that hasn't happened yet.

At times, I managed to let it just slip through, but there comes a moment that it makes me feel insecure.

You can't really eat a lot today for tomorrow's supply, right?

 Exactly . Let go of your worries  today and live for the moment.

* Let us take a moment of silence to pray for our Christians in Iraq. May the Lord be with them in this time of difficulties and shower them with His abundance blessings of peace. Amen.

Friday, August 1, 2014


Hi-ho August. :)

Indeed, hard work today and a fruitful tomorrow.  Easier said than done, right?

Plan your work, work your plan. It should be that way. Just like I've planned for my one week school holiday - planning to finish/complete all the task that I need to before resigning. Failed attempt, actually.

My one week holiday was preoccupied with a lot of things. Family outing, meeting and appointment. In short, I was spending more time outside instead of staying home. Phew.

And now, it's weekend already. August already. Wow. Time flows like water . Haha. So, directly-translated.

Okay, enough with procrastinating and  start working. 

Au revoir. :)

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

A cup of love

A cup of love - a year's blessings. ;)
It's been exactly a year being together with you, dear. :)

Thank you dear; for you have been my one year blessings. 

I know, I complained a lot, talk nonsense, cepat merajuk  and all but still, you are always there for me. Thanks. Love you lots. Hehe.

Above all, thank you Lord. Shower us with you abundance blessings that we may take a good care of our relationship; that we may never surrender to whatever challenges that come our way. Fill our hearts with love, joy, patience and understanding. Lead us not into temptations and guide us wherever we go. Amen. 

Sunday, June 8, 2014


 Source : Google image.
June. School holidays. Wedding seasons.

Been to  a cousin's wedding mass last Friday. Although, I've been to so many wedding masses before, there will always be that feeling of - " Wow, she or he is getting married".

The very-almost-same feeling I experienced once I entered the church that Friday. It was a mixed feeling - happy, mesmerized, wonderful, great and so much more. 

Life-Calling. This was one of the topic that caught me when the Father was giving his homily.

In life, there are  three callings - Single, Single and Religious, Married. All these three callings are good. 

These days, we tend to follow and expected to follow the norms around us.

At the age of 25++, you already have a stable job and  you are engaged to be married. That's the norm.
But the truth is, not all of us have that very same kind life stage. That includes me. I don't have a stable job yet and even far from getting married.

So, at one point, being a youth, somehow somewhere there is a time that you feel so left out and you wanted the same life stage happening in your life. That is also the time where you end up making a rush and soon to be regretful decision in your life. 

Just because your bff is getting married at the age of 25, doesn't mean that you have to get married on that very same age. Phew, blame the peer pressure I guess.

Well, as the Father was saying, all you need to do is pray for your life callings. Ask guidance from God. Define what you real life calling are and follow it. 

I, for once never have thought of that. Praying for my life calling. I've always thought that I will soon get married, and have a family of my own. But this homily, open up my eyes and to be exact my heart. To pray to God on what my real life callings are.

Till then, take care. 

Monday, June 2, 2014

June Edition

June 2014 - We've reached in the middle of the year. Thank God, thank you. Extremely grateful for every little blessings nor challenges that had happened in my  life.

Well, life is a bit busy. As always. Get back from work - tired - sleep . Phew. Nevertheless, thankful that I had a job. :)

Seriously, I missed being on inside story. I have a lot to tell but time forbids me so. Actually, I can if I really want to but being me, that extreme desire doesn't always come in hand. You see, I've learnt that almost everything is at the level of good enough. So, why bother of doing more if the current one is good enough? Haha. The positive and negative side of having that attitude.

Self conflict. Yeah, almost everybody been through that during their teen years. But, not me I guess. My teen years, well, to think back of it, it was a bit dull. Not to say that I wanted to do crime or what when I was 16, but I wish I could've step out of my comfort zone and explore new things.

So, in short, I don't have that self conflict or hormonal changes during my teen years. Hihi.

It may sound funny, but I'm actually experiencing it now. I feel like, I am having this self-conflict inside of me. After all this time, self conflict is finally occurring to me. Gosh.

I'm not quite sure how you guys may define a self conflict actually, but for me, my self conflict is actually, the feeling of inferiority and self doubt. Honestly saying, at times I feel myself so small comparing to others and I so feel like left out.

Not to say that I'm not being grateful for what I am now, but sometimes that feeling just came creeping inside. I wish I have the strength to tell myself that I'm not small or etc, but ya, I still choose to believe in my so irrational thought.

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Grown up issues #2

Almost all the things or stuffs happened in our life, we tend to complain. Even those tiny little things.
We complained a lot to, I mean expressing our dissatisfaction towards something mostly to our loved ones. Hehe. Right ?

Obviously, the reason of complaining to loved ones is mainly the attention. We want their attention on us. We want them to know what is happening around us.

I'm not sure if it applies to you, but it sure do to me. I complained because I want them to know my situation. At times, I complained because I need their opinion, thoughts or someone to back me up on that matter. But, all in all, I just want someone to listen to all of the complaints that I've made. Why loved ones? Because I trust you the most.

But then, listening to many complaints can be difficult too. Yes, I'm fully aware of that. Getting to hear too many complaints can make the listener fed up, bored or even mad. With you. In this case, it's me.Phew.

I'm not asking for much but the next time you ever hear me complain again, just please pretend that you're listening. That's all I'm asking for.

Complaining to loved ones is another way of releasing the stress inside - Yup, that's true. I'm just releasing the stress inside me. So please, don't get mad at me.

Wednesday, May 7, 2014

incikk ♥

indeed. ;)

Happy, happy birthday incikk dearr ! 

Another year older today. Hehe. ~ tuaa suda. hoho~

selamat hari jadi incikk. semoga anda semakin gojess dan ensem. haha. 

For the third time, happy birthday dearr. May all your wishes come true and hope that you will have a blessed birthday this year. and of course, blasted! Hoho.

Shower him with your abundance blessings, Lord; that he may be given the best health, success in whatever he do, prayers of hope and prosperity. Amen.

Thanks God! and thanks to you incikk. For I am lucky enough to have someone like you that makes saying good bye so hard.

Love you to the moon and back. Hehe. ♥♥

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Grown up issues #1

Phew, again. Blogging when April has almost come to its end. Busy? Ya, could be. A little bit. Well, grown up kan? Hehe

When I was a kid, I was so looking forward of being an adult. I remembered back then, when chatting on mIrC ( is that how it was spell? Fuh. I forgot already o), I lied about my age saying that I'm 19 instead of 12. Haha. mIrC was the 'in-thing' on that time. No one for sure want to chat with you, if you type in  12/F/ KK. Haha! (a/s/x ba. hehe)

Now, that 19 was way behind me already, I soo miss being one. I mean, not only 19, being kid or teenager to be exact.  On that time, I don't have to think a lot like I did now. Hmm.

Grown up issues #1 - Being with peers or colleague

Students world - You only got to mix and mingle with people that are around your age.
Working world - Mix and mingle with everybody . :)

I learnt a lot in being a newly grown up person. That, you cannot please everybody. 'Though you try hard to do your best and of course not disappointing others, still in the end- to fail attempt.

So, be grateful and just be yourself.

Sunday, March 30, 2014

emotionally unstable

March - almost to its end. Saying hello to April  soon enough.

Frankly speaking, I am emotionally unstable. Now. For no reason. I mean the main reason behind all the unstable emotion. Phew*

I admit, I've got a lot of things running on my mind - some are even irrational and illogical. *sigh*

Monday, March 24, 2014

Art Attack!

Ever heard of Brain Gym ? Well, for me, I've heard of it during my student years but not much information on it.

Now that I'm in a working world, I have always wanted to learn and experience new things - as in to gain more knowledge about OT, especially dealing with kids.

Aha! Grab the opportunities while you still can. Well, million thanks to the centre that I worked with and someone or maybe somebody who willingly sponsored us to join this two day course. Thank you! :)

Day 1 -Brain Gym

Well, this one day course is actually just the very basic and exposure of what brain gym is. So, we were only taught of 26 basic steps.  This course last for the whole day. Usually, I won't be able to stand that very long period of time. But, I did and I survived. It was fun then as I didn't even noticed the clock is ticking.

Sneek peek to the 2nd day course - Friendship Doodle! :)

Da2 -Double Doodle Play

Double Doodle Play as the name given - double the happiness and  joy in this second day course. I was never that interested nor motivated in art before but thanks to this course, I started to fall in love with art, colourful art. It is something that makes me feel so inspirational, motivated and energetic to do all the activities. Double Doodle - using both of your hands to draw and paint. Voila, see for yourself !

This is a friendship doodle that I got from Nat - thanks! :)

One of the drawings that I made using all the 5 key hands movement! Cantik kan ? Hehe

Well, I'm feeling so grateful that I'm able to join this course. My advise for you, do join this course this too and you won't regret it. Hehe. 

Thursday, March 13, 2014

Have faith

Too many incidents happened recently . The hottest issue right now - Missing of MH370 plane.

I, myself is also having my own personal issue. Come to think of it, this is maybe one of the challenges that I need to go through during this Lent Season.

Indeed, God always has something for me and of course, for us all. Never give up on God, as he never did on us.

#Pray for MH370 - may the mystery be solved.

Friday, February 14, 2014

Today's lesson #1

Thank you, 14th February - for you've inspired me to post something today. Once again, thank you. :)

Celebrating today with a new status . Haha. Not really celebrating, and not even a new status .

Scrolling down FB today and of course, everyone is talking about today. Special day, huh? Hmm.

Most of the status mentioned about  :

"... Valentine day is also for family and friends, not only for lovers.." - Exactly.

".. I love you.. Happy anniversary and etc.." - Woww, so sweet.

So,  I was like - where's mine ? Haha. *slap-face sikijap and remind diri, be grateful with everything *

I was actually feeling touched with someone's fb status. It's not actually touched, but I was kinda blur on how to describe the feeling, I mean my feeling. It's not usual for sure.

Well, back to my main point. I was going to share something that I've learned today. A lesson actually.

I was having lunch break with my colleagues and one of them shared a good news. Truly a good news and I felt so happy hearing it. Sharing happiness with others, double them. Exactly.

Then, it was learned that the other colleague help to pray for that good news .

So, today's lesson  - Pray for others, especially those who are in need. For once, I started to feel like I'm  a selfish person because all I do is pray for myself.

Thank you for today's lesson God. It really does reminded me of how weak I am and that I should have never lose my faith in You.


Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Being OT #5

Hello, February 2014! :)

Another year being an OT. Thank God.

Starting off this year's Messy Play & Classroom session with a "Mr. Blue Snowman".

Hello there! I'm the blue snowman! Weehuu!
I was planning to try on something that I rarely tried last year. So, snowman it is! Hehe.

Mr. Blue Snowman was actually made up of dough. I rarely tried this last year ( only once actually), because I'm not that confident enough if I could make a dough - on my own. Haha!

So this year, I made it; on my very first trial. *clap hands*

It's blue, because I put a blue food coloring on it. Looks interesting right? Hehe.

Till then, take care! ;)

Monday, January 13, 2014

Hi, 2014. :)

Are you one of them ?

I am not. Honestly saying, being a confident women is  still a long way journey for me. I know that I am loved, but there are moments that I still lived in fear; feeling negative and always have this thoughts of "if only" and "what if".

But, 2014 may be the beginning of trying to fix it all and one step closer to be a confident women. Amen . :)

Have you ever tried this ? 

 Another resolution for this year. Hopefully,  I would be able to work on this. 

Well, that is something to keep me going for this year. Actually, there's more but let's stick with that first.

What's yours ?

Anyway,be thankful for what you have and you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never have enough.

And, be a blessings to someone today. Giving is what loving is all about.

Take care. :)